Here I go

I re-joined Slimming World yesterday (other weight loss clubs and programs are available) - it's not the first time; I plan on it being the last though. As I said the other day I need to start finishing things I start, everything. I need to see something through to the end for a change. What could be a better thing to make first on the list than losing weight? Not only will it mean in a year I'm going to look better (as if beauty and perfection can look better.. hahaha) it will also mean I could add many more years onto my life, which in turn could mean I get to visit all 50 states - just as I dream I will :) That can never be a bad thing.

I tried sticking to it a while back again but couldn't really warrant the £20 per month it costs so I was logging onto a friends account (I know his log-on's and passwords to all the sites he uses). I know it's cheeky but when needs must and all that. Anyway, yesterday when I realised I need to get back into it full time and see it through, I logged on to his account to look something up and because he's not bothered going to his meetings (I'll get back to that in a second) they've revoked his internet access, so I either go to a weekly meeting (tried those before and hated them) or I paid out the £20 and get my own online access again - so, I paid out the £20. The one thing that does work in my favour and should help me stay on track is that whenever I've had to pay in the past I've stuck it out for the duration of the membership I've paid for (I've no idea why I fall off track because it really is the easiest thing in the world to do and stick to). I signed up for 12 weeks, so here's to the next 12 weeks :)  I'm going to admit I was extremely shocked when I stepped on the scales. I am the heaviest I've ever been in my life - it was a quite scary moment. I felt (feel) disgusted with myself. I knew I didn't like myself, I just didn't realise how much. Now I do and it's time to start liking myself again.

Besides wanting to lose the weight to look and feel good I also remembered how I want to horse ride when I get stateside and right now I am too heavy to do such a thing, so there's another incentive - as if living a longer life isn't the best one!! I also want to put myself on the donor list for blood cancer patients; my BMI is currently too high for me to do that. I have a list of so many reasons to stick to it; only one (my own weakness) that causes me not to stick with it. I very much doubt I will make it stateside before the end of this year so if I am able to stick with it all the photo's that include me when I do get there will have me looking absolutely fabulous :) The one part I am not looking forward to is the exercising. I am no fool, I can't just lose the fat, I have to tone up the remaining flab and that means exercise; the most boring of things ever invented. 

My brother-in-law is amazing and has just lost over 9st in the past year; last night he won "Man of the year" at his slimming world club. If his success doesn't spur me on then nothing will :) 

I can do this...... I can..... I CAN :)